I woke up that Tuesday morning to the sun shining in through the window. The clock on the otherwise bare, stark white wall, said it was a little after seven. The door to my room was open a few inches, but I did not hear much outside if it. I vaguely remembered someone telling me breakfast was at eight, but first things first, I had to pee.
I walked down to the nurses station, trying to observe and take in everything I could. No one at the station was familiar from the night before, but that would make sense. I did not speak when I got to the nurse's station; I didn't have to. My blank stare and wide eyes, a look they must have seen a million times before, spoke for me. One woman asked very sweetly, like if I were a lost three-year old, if I was Danielle. I just nodded. They all greeted me and a short round of introductions were given. Then she asked me, in that soft, sweet voice, if I need to use the bathroom. Again, I just nodded and someone came with me back to my room to unlock my bathroom door.
Bathroom doors are locked until you get doctor’s approval to have it kept unlocked.
I opened the shower curtain and realized the all-in-one cleanser was mounted to the wall in a soap dispenser. My hair was gonna love this… I turned on the water for the shower and was blown away; it had so much pressure that I actually let it beat on my shoulders, back, and neck for a massage. I stayed in there so long, had it so hot, I was almost limp when I got out, but I felt amazing.
Now I was ready to face my day.
For the next two days I spent most of my time in some sort of therapy. It was very therapeutic and I really started to feel better, like I had more direction, an idea of what I needed to help myself.
The rest of my visit was pretty much therapy and eating, three hots and cot, with my own bathroom, and housekeeping was through daily. The social worker gave me a list of resources to help me when I went back home.
Wednesday night, I ate my last meal with my new friends and left the hospital. My first stop was the pharmacy to fill a bunch of new prescriptions, the second stop was to see my son. It had been almost a week since I had seen him, and when he called me when I was in the hospital, I almost cried talking to him. I went to his dad’s house, gave him the biggest hug I could. I tucked him into bed, we chatted a little, and I sang Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star for him.
I collected my dog, who was also staying at dad’s, and went home. As a side note, the dog was so happy to see me, that he pushed my son out of the way multiple times to get a hug.
When I got home, everyone was watching tv in the living room. I got the dog set up, said hello to the cat, made a very stiff drink and just went into my room and closed over the door.
A little bit later, my boyfriend came in to check on me, sat with me for a little bit and then just let me be. Tomorrow was going to be a whole new day.
